Opinion: Poppy Seeds Can Fuck Off
They are nothing more than tiny, flavourless black dots that get EVERYWHERE, and they can all get fucked.
Justin Bieber Fan Passionately Sings Made Up Spanish
A fan of the Canadian pop star has reportedly performed a convincing rendition of Despacito, despite only knowing approximately one of the words.
Scandal: Musician Amy Shark Not A Real Shark
Photos have emerged showing the Australian artist on LAND, shocking her fans.
5 Hospitalised By Deadly Outbreak Of Mondayitis
Australians are being warned to avoid work for the next 24 hours after reports that a fatal new strain of the disease is in circulation.
Supermax 2 Set To Be Twice As Super, Three Times As Max
Corrections Minister David Elliot announced yesterday that the new Supermax 2 prison will double the standards of super set by Supermax 1, and triple their standards for max.
Man Posts To Website Again Like Year Long Break Never Happened
Local Man Completes Annual Transition From Complaining About Heat To Complaining About Cold
Following a pattern as old as time itself, local man Bruce Thompson has once again stopped saying “God it’s hot!” and started saying “God it’s cold!”
Australians Excited to Choose Between Rich Guy and the Other One
Polls have shown that the Australian public is looking forward to voting this weekend and are utterly thrilled with their two main options. Saturday 2nd July is voting day for the Australian federal election; a…
Sydney Weather Report: Cold, So Cold, Dear God Why Is It So Fucking Cold
Cloudy with a 100% chance of freezing your tits off.
11 Great Things To Do Instead Of Joining ISIS
Thinking of shipping off to Syria to become a scum-of-the-earth terrorist? Before you do, make sure you try each one of the things on this list!