“Oh that was last night? I was watching Season 2 of Frasier on Stan.”

In a mildly anticipated showdown, Melbourne Victory have defeated Newcastle Jets to win the A-League grand final. Despite some people saying they might give it a watch, the whole of Australia has simultaneously forgotten that it was happening.

Soccer is the most played sport in Australia, with 1.1 million participants in 2017, but most people still ignore the highest national level of the competition. Sarcasm Orgasm interviewed some forgetful fans this morning, and heard many different explanations as to why.

“Oh yeah, I meant to watch that. Guess it slipped my mind,” said one usually avid sports fan. “I ended up just playing FIFA. My Leeds United team are nearly in the Champions League.”

Several interviewees explained that the Sydney Swans and North Melbourne were playing in round 7 of the AFL, and decided this was more interesting and important than the ultimate match of the A-League.

“Well I don’t really get the final, to be honest,” another participant elaborated. “The blokes who came top of the table aren’t the winners? It doesn’t make sense.”

The Football Federation of Australia (FFA) have been heavily criticised for the steady decline in A-League popularity. Attendance at games peaked in the 2006/07 season, and has been getting worse ever since. This season saw the average turnout per match reach a woeful 10,926 – the lowest it’s been since 2011/12.

When asked if they planned to do anything to increase public interest in the game, the FFA offered a short but telling response.

“Nah, we good.”

Stay tuned for more exclusive coverage of the next A-League season, whenever the hell that starts.